Monday, May 9, 2011

Jazz Hands

I was laying in bed last night and was going through the day's events in my head. It was Mother's Day, we spent the day with Coal Miner's family looking at spots for our rehearsal dinner, showing his rents the wedding site, and eating dinner as a family to celebrate CM's Mom. All in all, a pretty good day. The sun was shining, we were productive, it was a good day. So why did I have this dread filling my head. This overwhelming urge to bury my head in my pillow and sleep forever. Was it depression? I think not. Depression is a serious disease and the term is hugely overused and under appreciated. Was I sad? Nah, I'm not really a sad person. Was it unhappiness? Hmph. Could it be? Could I be unhappy? No way. How could I even begin to think I was unhappy? I have my health, an amazing man, a supportive and loving family, a great group of friends, a roof over my head, a job that pays me well, the respect of my peers. I just felt like I could go on and on listing the reasons as to how I could not possibly be unhappy. And in that moment I made a decision. Instead of thinking of the overwhelming tasks that lie ahead of me each week, maybe I just approach things a little differently. To ensure I stay on task I've decided I'm going to chronicle my journey on Tumblr. Feel free to follow along if you feel so inclined. I'll basically just be jotting down notes each day as to why I'm happy, why I should be happy, and how I'm feeling. An online journal of sorts. I haven't written in my diary in over a year. I miss it. I loved writing in my diary. Going back, reading the happenings, seeing my feelings, reminiscing over events. So I'm going to treat Tumblr as my diary. Maybe that's a good thing, maybe it isn't, but hell I figure you should try everything at least once right?

Here's to Happy Journaling - wish me luck.

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