Last night I was watching the "Moment of Truth" show on Fox. Its actually a pretty disturbing show. Not because people are trying not to lie in order to win money, but because people are so deep in their lies and so unable to be truthful with those they love that they have to go on national television and use the excuse of trying to win money as their way to spill the truth. I wonder sometimes if all of our lives are nothing but a series of lies with the truth spilling out every now and then. So I decided today that I was going to talk about the truth and whether or not its always necessary to give the most honest answer.
I know sometimes people don't think that individuals should be spared of their feelings. I know I used to feel this way. Spill it all out and let them feel the pain of the truth, its the only way to find resolution. But today, and perhaps this is because of my current emotional status, I don't
necessarily know that this is the right way to do things. Was it absolutely necessary for the lady on "Moment of Truth" last night to admit before a
studio audience, her husband and family, and the entire United Sates of America that she would dump him for her ex-boyfriend, she has slept with other men, and sometimes she takes her ring off to appear single when she is out with her friends? Perhaps it was, but maybe she could have spared some of the details. Spared him the
embarrassment, spared her family the
embarrassment, spared his heart which was clearly braking in front of everyone. I think we get so wrapped up in our own lives sometimes that we forget who we are hurting. In order to make ourselves feel better we hurt those around us. I guess its makes us feel powerful. Or maybe its just easier, I'm not sure.
This weekend I went out and ran into on my of my
acquaintances (who is married) clearly spending the evening with an
individual who was not their spouse. Of course, its not my place to say anything to their spouse about this run-in, but it makes me wonder. Whose responsibility is it? I know they've had some issues in the past with infidelity but I was under the impression this had passed and the relationship was on the mend. Clearly I was wrong. The truth would only hurt the person so I'll just continue to hide my sympathy for this person with a smile. But it made me wonder, are we all
susceptible to this? Does this happen more than I realize? Are we just a nation of lying infidels?
This weekend was
particularly hard for me. I ran into someone cheating on their spouse, I had another
individual say to me "I wish I wouldn't have brought [insert name]. Do you know how much [insert bad word about female
genitalia] is here?" and then a lady told the person I was with that she wanted to show him her tits and have sex with him. This then turned into a huge
argument which ended badly and we are still not speaking
because of it. Infidelity at its finest...all based on lies....which will all become even bigger lies in the future...which will all lead to someone sitting in chair on "Moment of Truth" on Fox Mondays. I don't want to be in that chair nor do I want to be on the receiving end of that chair.
Okay so as everyone knows the past two weeks have been my own personal hell. I spent the first week sobbing uncontrollably, retracing my steps, rehashing my conversations and wondering what the hail I did. The second week (which we are currently experiencing) has had a different mindset completely. On Monday I tried to initiate contact with no response. So I decided that was it. No more Megan trying, let someone else try for a while. See how great it is when I'm not around. Okay so that brings us to Wednesday, and one of my LadyFriends saying "We should go to Spain!" for me to realize, YES I SHOULD GO TO SPAIN. Why not? I don't have a dog, a plant, or anything that will die while I'm gone, so why not? I have no responsibilities other than my job, so why not? So, I did it, I booked the ticket today and off to Spain I will go in May. Now comes the not so jovial part, it took everything in my body not to write an email telling the good news. The first person I wanted to tell isn't currently acknowledging my prescence...sigh...it was a sad moment amongst my joy. Maybe in time I can talk about my fantastic trip coming up. Maybe in time...