Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The B*tch is Back


I know, I know, I've been neglecting my blog.  But it isn't b/c I don't love to blog, its b/c I haven't really had anything that fun to talk about that isn't mushy and lovey and makes you want to throw up a little when you read about how wonderfully in love I am (see I just gagged a little at myself).  Just got back from Thanksgiving with the fam which is always a good time.  My family is so much freaking fun.  Not only does my father come out with the best one liners, the twins (my niece and nephew) have now joined the bandwagon.  At 3 & 1/2 years old they are really starting to make me proud.  For instance let me share this little exchange with my nephew:
3 1/2 yr. old nephew:  Megan where are your kids?
Me:  Well I don't have any kids
3 1/2 yr. old nephew:  Why not?
Me:  Because I haven't gotten married yet and chosen to procreate.
3 1/2 yr. old nephew:  Huh?
Me:  I'll start popping some out soon kiddo, don't you worry.
3 1/2 yr. old nephew:  Soon???  I'll be old by the time you do.

I mean seriously, now I'm getting pressure from my 3 1/2 year old nephew????  What is this world coming to?  I bet my mother put him up to that, I can almost guarantee she dropped that little nugget on him!  Or he's just a smart little sh*t and knew what buttons to press.  Pulls at my heart strings I tell ya, pulls at 'em (can you feel the sarcasm?).

At any rate, it was a good holiday.  My grandmother got a little tipsy at dinner (She had a cosmo and a glass of wine.  She is 89 years old and weighs about 90 lbs.  She is RAD!) and asked me (out loud mind you) if I thought it was possible for my sister to get any cheaper than she already was (it is not possible, though I'm betting I could be surprised by her).  She also told me that if she didn't approve of Coal Miner than I was to dump him immediately and find a suitable replacement.  Oh and that she was glad I wasn't driving home on Thanksgiving so that I could drink with her.  God I love my grandmother. 

Coal Miner met the fam, they loved him.  I mean who wouldn't?!?!  I think Coal Miner liked the 757.  Who knows, maybe I could get him to move back there if we could find some good jobs (hint hint, ahem, hint).  I seriously loathe the 703/202, mostly because of the traffic and inability to plan any type of activity without padding in traffic/travel time.  Spur of the moment no longer exists in my life and that just makes me a sad sad girl. 

Oh please note that I have been locked into skiing on NYE.  DEAR GOD HELP ME.  If I break anything or come back with bruises so large someone will assume that I get my a$$ beat on a regular basis by my roid loving boyfriend, I'm never going to forgive Coal Miner.  Until the day we die I'm going to say "Remember that time you made me go skiing and told me it was going to be easy...."  Well at least that's how the conversation will start.  I will of course embellish and make it a lot worse than it actually was, but that's my steeze so lay off. 

I'm rambling and I need to do a weekly metrics report and quarterly graphs (did you just jiz with excitement over what I need to get accomplished today at work?) so I'm peacing out.  Later betches.


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