Tuesday, October 27, 2009

I'm Cracking the Code

So yesterday I get a text from Under Armor asking me to go see a movie.  Ummm, its been July since our last date.  The infamous date in which he hit it and quit it.  So why, please someone tell me why, would he text me and ask me (okay yes I already see that the text is the first problem, pick up a phone dude) to go on a date this week?  I decide to tell Coal Miner about this little incident b/c we have absolutely no secrets and he let's me know why this has happened.  The conversation goes a little something like this:

Me:  So this guy from Match texted me and asked me to go out on a date to the movies this week.  Unbelievable... *long pause*
Coal Miner:  Oh really?  When's the last time you went out with him? (very suave CM, I see you trying to figure out if I was double-dipping).
Me:  I don't know August...no...JULY!  Dude I haven't been out with him since July. *I'm yelling*
CM:  Did you hook up with him?
Me: Yea
CM:  On the first date
Me:  No! *said with disgust*  You know me, I don't do that on the first date!!!  It was like the second date.
CM:  Oh, well then he's just stacking his weekend up.
Me:  Excuse me?
CM:  Yea he was probably banging you and a few other chicks and he thinks his sure bet is gonna fall through this weekend so he's trying to get you scheduled.  I used to do it all the time. *said with no emotion at all*
Me:  You used to participate in this behavior?
CM:  F*ck yea! *said with gusto*
Me:  Nice *said with a slight tinge of sarcasm*
CM:  Listen baby, it goes like this.  As a dude you aren't really ready to settle down, but you may/may not like some of the chicks you are banging.  So you keep them around until you are ready or until you need to get laid.  I used to do it all the time.
Me: Mmmmm hmmmm *said all ghetto*
CM:  That is until I met you of course.
Me:  Oh cut the bullshit.  I can't believe this.  You guys are assholes. *said very adamant like*
CM:  Yea, but it works. *again, no emotion*
Me:  I thought he wanted to be friends with me.  I mean I thought he liked me, b/c I'm cool, and fun to hang out with, and I can drink ya know.
CM:  Yea, he didn't.  He was planning on banging you again.  No dude ever wants to be friends with a chick they were banging at one time.  Hey was this the "hit it and quit it" guy? *so inquisitive*
Me:  Ummm, yea.  Anyway, next topic.
CM:  Sloot, my baby is a sloot.
Me:  F*ck you, how many people have you slept with again?
CM:  Whatever *laughing*
Me: Richard *not laughing*

So apparently Under Armor never even liked me as a friend. He just wanted a piece of my sweet pie again.   I mean yea I know he's mentioned that previously in texts (like only a few 100 times) and I've just ignored it and seen him as flirting. But homeboy seriously has no interest in being my friend?!?!?! Why wouldn't you want to be friends with me if I never plan to do you again? I'm the raddest chick I know. His loss and CM's gain. B/c let's be real folks...DoubleM is severely falling in love with CM *le sigh* God he's hot, and smart, and sweet, and loving, and wonderful. Okay enough bragging about my amazing boyfriend. Just thought I would share with you some of the "lovey" thoughts I've been having as opposed to the "F this!" thoughts I usually have.

Peace out from the norfwes side of DC.

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