I was watching "Jersey Shore" the other day, shut up you know you watch it as well so I really don't want to hear even a peep out of you, and realized that while I say that these people are absolutely ridiculous they are completely normal. They are young. Think back to when you were 22, you acted in a similar fashion. Maybe I'm the only one, but it may not have been quite as intense or Jerseyish, but I was definitely a "situation" when I went out on the weekends. Weren't you?
Think about it, we all used to go out and get faced. I mean like faced. We used to start fights, with random people for no reason. Mostly b/c we had been pre-drinking since 7pm b/c we couldn't afford to drink at the bar, so we got to the bar at like 11pm and were totally sh*tcanned by that point. So someone would nudge us, or pass us, or drop their drink on us, and WATCH OUT b/c shiz was going down. Never mind the fact that most of the time those people had no intention of pissing us off, or even nudging us in the least bit and were probably too drunk to even notice they dropped a drink on us. But we were 22, drunk, and invincible. We were loud, obnoxious, conceited, over zealous, omnipotent, cheap dressers, self absorbed, etc. We WERE the cast of "Jersey Shore" whether you like it or not folks.
My whole point to this was not supposed to be about getting faced when I was 22. The whole point was supposed to be around the dynamics of that group. When you are young you have these people in your life who are your party friends. You think at the time that they are your closest friends, they will do anything for you, they will be there for you when you need it most, they are your people. But they aren't. Those people are just your going out friends. They will never be anything more. Perhaps one of them will turn into something more than that, but most likely you will grow up, stop going out, stop getting faced, and you will have nothing in common. This too will happen to the Jersey Shore people. Just like it did on "The Hills" - Lauren Conrad didn't want to be surrounded by those people any longer. They were fun, when she was into just having fun, but she wanted more, just like all of us want more as we get older (I know this b/c Lauren and I are good friends and she told me that herself <-- I'm totally kidding, I'm just assuming I know this about Lauren. WORSE.).
I realized the other day my sorority was also a lot like Jersey Shore. Now before anyone gets pissed off please know that I met some amazing ladies during my time in the sorority. Some of which I'm still very close (best of friends) and talk to on a regular basis. Others that I'm not so close to but still enjoy catching up with, laughing with, and stalking on Facebook. However, if you really think back to the ole sorority days, you find the people you were closest with were just a facade. In their defense we had no idea who we were when we were 18 - 21 years old. Like anyone they grew out of being friends with me and vice versa. I can't fault them - it happens. But what makes me sad about the entire situation (no pun intended) is how it all played out. I know people come in and out of your life for a reason. They are either worth fighting to keep in your life, or it just doesn't make sense to fight at all. Somewhere along the way I lost people. I'm not even sure anymore if it was me who lost them or if they lost me. Was it my doing? Was it their doing? Did they even notice? When did I notice? Do I want to reach out? Should I reach out? Do I care? Time passes, and people change, and life takes you in a different direction. But these ladies were, for four years at a minimum, such an integral part of my life. Am I just different now? Should I just let it go?
I struggle with this question often...did you notice a small theme in my blogs?
On a different note - my girlfriend (one of my sorority sisters, seee I still talk to a lot of them) and I were having drinks the other night and she told me that she ended up having drinks one night w/a young lady (ripe age of 23) working with the ex. The young girl, in full detail, explained to my friend how long ex and I dated, what type of relationship we had, how it ended, and most importantly that it really wasn't serious and I really wanted to get married and he didn't. DOOOO WHHAAATTTT??? Who the FRACK is this chick? WTH is my ex telling these young bucks? Whatever, I could care less, but in all honesty, it was hurtful. How dare someone say that 4 years of your life isn't serious...but maybe, in his mind, it wasn't. That's so sad to me. I'm sad for him. I'm not sad for me b/c I got seriously upgraded to first class with Coal Miner, but I'm sad for him that this is what he's telling people. I'm sad that this is what makes him feel better about himself, about the situation. I'm sad that lying is the only way. I would have hoped that he could be mature about the situation and quite frankly not discuss it in detail with individuals who don't know me, nor were they involved in the relationship. But perhaps that's his coping mechanism. Perhaps that is really how he feels. If so, I'm fine with that, I just wish he could find the peace that I did with the outcome. Maybe this is his peace, and if so, good luck to you my old friend, wish you nothing but greatness.
And that's that!